The concept that is friendship is a beautiful thing yet it can cause people heartbreak. The solidarity, the trust and how easy It is to break that.

I am not alone in this world, I call some people my friends. In terms of them calling me their friend is a different story. I watch others as they smile and laugh with their friends. I overhear the phrase “childhood friends” And that prompts the thought to my head. Who have I know since I was a child? And the honest truth is, I don’t have that privilege as I left my childhood friends in Nigeria. But then again I did move here when I was still young. Then I’m forced to face the harsh truth of the matter. No one liked me when I was young. ( not because they hated me, but I was really shy and still adapting to my new world) I’ve often wondered how it looks so easy for others to make and have friends, whereas I’ve worked incredibly hard for that privilege.

I used to struggle to initiate conversations with people. But now what I struggle with is maintaining the friendship. As I’ve grown in confidence, I find that I click instantly with some people. I’ve often been told by friends that I am quick to make big gestures like visit those who are far away and support them on their adventures, although terrible at the little things, like constant communication and I often tend to have drifting periods.

I have a very different personality to many. I am very harsh in the way I speak. Not in my lack of love for the person, but more on my one sided approach. I tolerate very little and I take it out on them. I am working very hard to change that. I love people and I love being around them.

Osi x